Tips To Keep Your Joy - Conclusion

In our conclusion to this series on keeping your joy we're discussing tip #6 & #7, the importance of forgiveness and maintaining a positive self image. Both are closely tied to the amount of joy and fulfillment that you have in your life.

#6 Don't Hold Grudges

Be willing to let go of old hurts, bitterness or unforgiveness toward anyone in your life. Holding on to negative emotions becomes emotionally and physically toxic overtime. Sometimes we feel that holding on to bitterness gives proof that what was said or done to us was wrong. Or many people felt that they were punishing the person that hurt them by remaining bitter toward them. However, the person that ends up hurting the most is the one that refuses to forgive and move on. Don't allow yourself to be held "hostage" in your past. Learn to let go, to trust again, to love again and to live again. Be sure that you focus on changing yourself instead of waiting for the other person to change. And don't set unrealistic expectations for others so you don't continue to set yourself up for disappointment. Always expect the best and believe the best about others, but be willing to be flexible and forgiving if they don't live up to all of your expectations. Practice forgiveness on a daily basis. You will find that you enjoy your life and maintain your joy as never before.

#7 Pay Attention To Your Self Talk

Pay attention to the kinds of thoughts and feelings that you have about yourself during the day. Are you thinking positive, self affirming thoughts? Examples of self defeating thoughts are statements like, "I may never make it in life", "I should give up", "I'm not all that smart or talented", "nothing good ever happens for me". Really take time to examine what you are saying about yourself in your quiet time. You may be surprised that there are adjustments that need to be made. If you are going to gain and keep joy in your life. You will have to have a good self image. If your self image needs improving there are many ways you can accomplish this. Spend time in prayer and finding out what the Bible has to say about who you are and what you can achieve. Also take some time at the beginning of each day to make statements of faith about your life and what you are believing for. Everyday you should get up and declare that "this will be the best day of my life and that something good is going to happen today." As you do this you will begin reprogramming your "self talk" and creating new positive thought patterns.

Make today the best day of your life!

Junice LaGreen-Rockman of Murfreesboro, TN writes about spiritual and
motivational issues. Follow her column every Friday in the DNJ and
check out her blog at http://jrockmotivates.blogspot.com/ Email:jrockmotivates@gmail.com

Tips To Keep Joy In Your Life – Pt II

In last weeks column we discussed tips #1 – 3 on maintaining joy in your life. Let’s take a look the impact investing in your friendships and yourself will have on increasing the joy in your life:

#4 Maintain Your Friendships

Actively work to maintain your friendships and realize that it will take effort on your part. I once heard someone say, “People should develop their friendships in life now, because on your 60th Birthday, you don’t want to realize that you have no one to invite to your celebration”. This statement may sound somewhat sarcastic but it is so true. If you don’t make cultivating friendships in your life a priority and don’t actively work at maintaining them, they will fade over time. It is equally important to develop new friendships as well as cherishing the old. Having friends in your life can help provide a balanced life that isn’t all work and “no play”. Good friends will help you see your strengths, cheer you on as you pursue your dreams and also challenge you in areas that you need to change. One man shouldn’t be an island to himself. Don’t wait until the holiday season or for major life events to occur to stay in touch. Get out today, reconnect with friends and let them know how much you care! Your joy will be rejuvenated by taking a little time to share a quick conversation, dinner or a cup of coffee with a cherished friend.

#5 Exercise & Eat Healthy

You must invest in yourself! It’s sad to say but many of us are more concerned about what we put in or on our cars than we are for our very own bodies! Take some time to get outdoors, get some fresh air and exercise. Enjoy the sunshine even in the colder months - get out and get active. Regular exercise will increase your circulation, strengthen your immune system and add longevity to your life. But it will also improve your mental and emotional state. If you aren’t already regularly exercising, don’t put pressure on yourself to work out everyday. Gradually build a routine maybe just starting with 15 – 20 minuets a couple of times per week. Also consider increasing your daily water intake to 8 – 10 glasses per day to flush out your system. Avoid fast foods and take a little bit of preparation time to pack healthy snacks or lunches to take with you to work. Some suggestions of great energy foods to pack are – fresh fruits, vegetables, granola, peanuts, almonds, soups or salads. Try to refrain from having dessert with every meal and maybe limit it to the weekends. You’ll feel so much better from the inside out. When you invest time in yourself, your outer and inner image will improve. Improving the way you look and feel will undoubtedly increase your personal joy!

Next week we will conclude our discussion on maintaining your joy with tip #6 – Don’t Hold Grudges & #7 – Pay Close Attention to Your “Self Talk”!

As always, make today the best day of your life!

7 Ways To Keep Your Joy

1. Love Yourself

This is something that we've all heard at one time or another and most
of us know we are supposed to love ourselves. However, for some, this
may be easier said than done. Many studies show that our
personalities are fully defined by the age of 5. At an early age we
are shaped by the negative or positive messages that we receive from
our teachers, school mates, family members. There's an old adage that
says, "you are your own worst critic". If you find that you are
always being highly critical of yourself and just never feel that you
measure up, you must begin working to truly love yourself. A
suggestion is to write a list of 30 of your good characteristics and
each day for an entire month, when you wake up, say aloud, "I am
grateful that I am a generous person, a good friend to others, a good
dad, a beautiful person, that I have my health, etc." Also remember
how much you are loved by God. You were created in His image. Say to
yourself, "If God can love me, I can love me!"

2. Don't Have Unrealistic Expectations of Others

Realize that there are no perfect people on the planet and if you give
it some thought, you realize that you are not perfect yourself! So
give others in your life a break. Don't set unrealistic expectations
for others to fulfill or you will continually be disappointed. You
shouldn't depend on anyone else for your joy, your strength or to
answer every problem in your life. Begin to draw on that joy, strength
and wisdom from God and from within yourself. You will find that you
are much happier and more fulfilled. It will also help others feel
more at ease around you because they don't feel that you are putting
unfair pressure on them.

3. Live In the Moment

Do you find yourself always looking forward to the next big phase in
your life and not enjoying where you currently are? While goal setting
is important and striving toward reaching them is essential, you must
also enjoy the ride along the way! Find little moments in your life
everyday to celebrate and enjoy. Don't put off your happiness until
that next job comes, the next customer for your business or until
you've moved into your dream home. Don't wait for perfection in your
marriage, your children your friendships. Be determined to seek out
the good and celebrate it as you ENJOY the journey to fulfilling your
dreams.

Stay tuned for steps 4-5 next week and as always, make today the best
day of your life!

Junice LaGreen-Rockman of Murfreesboro, TN writes about spiritual and
motivational issues. Follow her column every Friday in the DNJ and
check out her blog at http://jrockmotivates.blogspot.com/ Email:
jrockmotivates@gmail.com
--
Junice Rockman
Motivational Writer & Speaker
Subscribe to my blog at: http://jrockmotivates.blogspot.com/

Many opt to save this Christmas

Many families are feeling a financial crunch this season and opting to save money instead of going all out on Christmas spending this year.

If you decide to cut back and save cash this year, be sure to reduce not only your spending but also actually put aside extra money from what you would have previously spent.

For example, if you would usually spend $1,500 on Christmas, decide to spend $750 and put the other $750 into an interest-bearing account. Also keep in mind that not everyone is suffering financially. If you are one who isn't experiencing struggle, you can still take this year to cut back on holiday spending and use some of the extra money for savings and to donate to local charities or families in need.

Here are a few ideas to help you save this holiday.

1. Make a shopping list and stick to your budget.

Make a list of those you plan to shop for as far in advance as possible. Do your very best to stick to shopping for only those on the list. You may receive a few unexpected gifts from friends or co-workers. So set aside a predetermined amount of cash to purchase things for those you received gifts from unexpectedly that you want to give back to. You may only want to set aside $25 to $75 for this. You can find men's or women's gifts on sale for $5 to 10 each at stores like Ross, Wal-Mart or Walgreens. Also consider giving $5 gift cards to places like Starbuck's or Subway. Just $5 cards to stores like these will pay for a cappuccino or a sub lunch for a friend.
Once you've reached your budgeted spending amount, leave the stores right away! This way you won't be tempted to buy one more item. Only purchase what you can pay for now. It just doesn't make sense to get into debt to buy a gift now that you will still be paying for months after Christmas.

2. Do a gift exchange.

If you have a larger family or group of friends, doing a gift exchange will save money, time and the potential stress of trying to find the perfect gift. If you still have time, this weekend set up a secret Santa list via e-mail and decide to exchange gifts on Christmas or before. You can also agree to only buying gifts that are a certain amount. This will eliminate feeling pressure to buy a gift of a certain amount or being concerned you aren't spending enough.

3. Create coupons that offer your time or service.

This is something fun for families to do for each other. You can give a coupon/gift card that can be exchanged for your time for things like housekeeping, organizing, a car wash, running errands for dry cleaning or baby-sitting. These are all valuable services that will save time and money for the person you are giving to.

Make today the best day of your life!